"I'm not frightened of it, but it feels strange." - Kathryn
"Well, pedophilia is just a normal human instinct, but irony is deeply perverse and wrong." - Jordan
"Trey, stop kicking my midget!" - Natalie
"The following are the acts in which you will pleasure me. As soon as I tell you the time at which you should come, it shall behoove each and everyone of you most zealously to come. To the one who has his contingent best equipped I will give gifts." - Xerxes as recorded by Herodotus
"Oh, that's why it was hurting!" - Natalie
"Your hair is, like, mysterious...and it's kinky and cute at the same time. I like it." - Weird Boy to Danielle
"I'll be your boyfriend." - Natalie to Danielle
"What if you just had a giant spoon for a leg?" - Danielle"
"Buttsex is not sugar." - Laura
Sam: You're just an ass on legs to the rats.
Natalie: I am.
"Patrick, I've already seen your boa constrictor." - Micah
"I have holes in my pants...they're really bad holes." - Natalie
"Kill him! He's a man in a skirt!" -Danielle
"It's like giving a teddy bear brass knuckles!" - Zoe in reference to Hyphen buzzing his hair
"I'm not a violent person, but given the chance, I would KILL her!" - Kathryn
"Balthazar is inside of all of us!...in a metaphorical sense [said defensively]" - Josh
"I don't need a man, I've got Zoe." - Whitney
"I'd like to lay on Little Matt's bed in my underwear....I think it'd be comfortable." - Josh
"I got condom juice all over my leg." - Danielle
"There is no economic incentive ot doing the rats!" - William
Whitney: Why are you invading my personal space?
Danielle: ...Because I thought it might be cozy?
"It's better to grab it and wrestle it than...like...let it attack you" - Whitney, "it" being something behind you while you're asleep
"Cuz its cozy inside here, lemme tell you." - Whitney
"Turkey basters are the new penis." - Josh
"Is that a crotch?" - Danielle
"I have this one blockage I just can't get through." - Josh
"I'll kick you in your maidenhead." - Manuel
"Scotchguarding Mormons?" - Kathryn
"I do hate a flaccid Sinclair." - Micah, Sinclair being an inflatable, squeaky dinosaur
"Very few people ever fish for lozenges." - Elizabeth
"It's the original...with a country wang." - Kyle
"I always notice a nice rack!" - Danielle
"I'm a butch transvestite pirate!" - William
"I'd never met a Jewish person outside the camp." - Trey
"I don't have a vagina, and that bothers me." Trey